“Once again he/she gets the attention and is using up the household income on their own therapy and I am left carrying their stuff on my own”.
This is an understandable complaint don’t you think? Partners, that is NOT how it ought to be or need to remain. There is help for female partners of sex addicts.
There is only a handful of women’s support groups for partners of sex addicts in a few parts of the country. The Kairos Centre has developed such a support Group for Female partners who can attend online, face to face, individual or group session. Check out the Course Calendar or contact me.
What is the programme content? Teaching and discussion on the following:
- Definition of sex addiction and Love addiction
- Common understandable error patterns which partners fall into and battles you will lose
- The role of the addiction
- Partners absolute “No No’s”
- What can we learn about “Adult/Parent/Child” ego state interactions
- Family of Origin, contributors and what set up the addiction
- You are not alone
- Effect on the stars – Hollywood, Professionals, the good and the great, across the board – all are susceptible
- Evolution of the sexual template and map
- Cycle of addiction
- How much should I ask about his past behaviours?
- Trust, money, healthy sexuality
- Self responsibility & self care
- Own support groups
- Attachment, Shame, Narcissism, Co-dependency
- Grief cycle
- Questions women ask; hope, fears and reservations
- Disclosure: family and the children
- Legality issues
- Restoring the relationship or leaving the relationship
- Recommended reading
Contact The Kairos Centre to request your FREE “Partner’s information pack”.
Partner or wife of a Judge, Clergy, solicitor, Barrister, Accountant, teacher, IT Consultant, Utilities operator, facilities manager, HR Personnel, Company Director, Actor – Whichever of these male personnel with whom you are in relationship, sex addiction having its tentacles in your relationship, will leave you carrying a very heavy burden, with few people there for you to talk to about the impact on you.
“Will it ever get better? Can he really stop? Will I ever be able to trust him again? How do I know the children are safe? How do I compete with that stuff? Was it my fault or did I contribute? Was I not enough or good enough? How could I have been so stupid? How is it that I did not heed the signs that I now look back on and can see them? What do I do now? Do I really believe there is such a thing as sex addiction? Isn’t it just greed for more sex? What a nightmare? Where can I turn for help? What if people find out? How can I bear to carry this on my own? I am scared to join some form of women’s group. Their problems are not like mine. What if it gets out? My husband won’t agree to me attending a group. He is getting his help, but I have to hold on in there and not tell anyone in case.” It’s just not right. It’s just not fair. This is my life. He has ruined it. What am I going to do?
Women partners of sex addicts are frequently overlooked when it comes to treatment regimes – which typically focus on the man. Here is an introductory, highly confidential workshop for women ONLY to consider just some of the issues raised about – if you are able to put some trust in this facility which is there for you to get the help you need. The aim is to facilitate likeminded women finding friendship and support amongst each other, which they develop outside of the meetings.
Why group? You will face the strongest of resistance about getting involved. Many women will, however, testify to the fact that joining a group was the best outcome for their recovery. Why? The relief that other progressive, “got it all together women” are similarly affected! There is immediate shame reduction when you see normal, every day women facing the very same issues. Remember “Shame” is the base for keeping the men’s addiction firmly in place and shame will similarly keep you from the group.